Welcome to Middle School! Now What?

 After reading this great advice post at the Parent Tool-kit website, I wanted to quickly post a little top 10 list of Middle School Parent Advice. I am doing this a little selfishly as I am now just one year away from having my first-born become a middle school child and have four more children who will hit middle school (and their teenage years) in the years following. So, I need to prepare just as much as all of you. So here goes....

1. Ask for help when you need it. Whether it be from another parent, a teacher, the principal, the counselor, your child's friend, or even your child....ask! Parents cannot single-handily raise a middle school child, I think it might be impossible! The saying "it takes a village to raise a child" I think was specifically said about middle school children! Biologically, their brains are starting to tell them to be less dependent on their parents, but they still listen to adults...just not always their parents. So, please, ask for help when in need.

2. Good days, bad days. No matter what your child is like now, they will have good days and they will have some really bad days. And in many cases, there is not a whole lot of difference in what happened, just how they perceive what happened. It depends on their brain chemicals and hormones and how they are working that particular day. Just listen, be understanding,  and try to help where you can. But listening is the most important.

3. Homework and school work. Have them do SOMETHING school related each night, even if for only 15 minutes. Study some flashcards, quiz them on their math, ask them to show you something they learned. Look online to find out when their next test is and start studying for the test. Set goals. Something! And if they get behind, get a hold of the teacher and set up a plan to catch up. Set some goals....and get caught up!

4. Oh...set goals! So your new middle school child wants to be independent huh? Fine...have them set goals and make a plan to achieve these goals. Grade goals, fitness goals, sports goals, saving money goal, hobby goals, even video game goals! The process of setting a goal and working for it is what matters. You can eventually use this as a way to get them thinking much further into their future goals: College, career, life plans.

5. Careers...start thinking about them. They do not need to decide on a career during middle school, but this is when they can really start dreaming of this career and you can start helping them understand what it takes to get to that career. They are never too young to research and job shadow possible careers.

6. Friends. I am going to cheat and simply agree with what the parent tool-kit blog post said. Your middle school child needs multiple groups of friends. As a counselor there is one thing I can guarantee you: Your child will have a major breakdown with their friends and that breakdown could last a day, a week, or even the rest of the year. When that happens to a child who had no other groups of friends, that is painful to watch. They are completely isolated and alone. But when it happens to a child who can go to another group of friends for support, the pain can be greatly lessened. Plus, it is just plain healthy to have a variety of friends and will help your child in the long run. How to do this? Have your child get involved, have them play with friends after school, have different friends over at different times. And of course, get to know all of their friends...and their families.

7. Technology and their online world. Most (not all) kids are using technology and many are online. I cannot stress enough that this is not the place to give them total independence. It is simply too dangerous. And I don't just mean online predators and sexting, I also mean innappropriate emails, misunderstood texts and cyberbullying, and viewing explicit sites on the Internet. I have had students tell me they have two accounts for each social network, one their parent knows about and follows and one they don't. I have students saying they know how to delete texts before parents see them and have found sites where they can harrass and bully others anonymously and do not see what is wrong with this. With all of this said, I am a big supporter of technology, but cannot stress enough how much you need to have open communication with your child and need to speak with them often about their technology use.

8. Open Communication. The three years of middle school might be the toughest and strangest three years of life your child goes through. They need someone they can talk to and someone they can trust. Parents are the best choice for this but trust and openness has to be established. Remember, their brains are telling them to get away and be independent, but they have so many issues and questions that need help at the same time. Don't accept "I'm okay", "Nothing.", and "I'm fine." for an answer. Get your child talking and earn that trust. You will be amazed at how great these "difficult" conversations actually are. And your relationship will become even better.

9. Beware of mental health issues. Mental health issues (if they are going to occur) usually begin with the onset of puberty. Depression, anxiety, OCD, suicidal thoughts, etc. Middle schools are seeing more and more mental health issues for a variety of reasons, one of which is that puberty is occurring earlier and earlier over the decades and this is bringing mental health issues into the age range of 10-14. So just like our teachers are learning more and more about the warning signs and symptoms of mental health issues, parents should too. And please remember....a mental health illness is just like a physical illness. It needs medical attention and CAN be cured or treated. Don't ignore it, help your child work through it and get them better.

10. Have fun. Seems weird to think about "fun" after all of these stressful items. But any middle school teacher will tell you that the reason he/she loves teaching middle school is because these kids are "fun". They really are. They will test you and they will think they hate you at times, but even in those moments you have to sit back and laugh (after they have gone to sleep or left for a friend's house) and realize that the middle school human child is a really fun species and one that you will want to spend time with and get to know and have fun with. This stage is really the last stage where your child is still a "child", so enjoy it and enjoy the ride!

   I am excited for another year of middle school and meeting all of the new students and working with all of the returning students again. And I definitely plan to have fun as well. I hope you do too!

Many Ways to Teach Kids to Code

   As the new school year approaches, I have an opportunity for the 3rd straight year to team up with our business partners at Telligen to help 30+ middle school students learn about technology and do some pretty fun and amazing things with technology through our Hyperstream club. This year, we will focus more on coding skills. So....what exactly does it mean to "code"? Coding is what makes it possible to create computer software, programs, apps, games, etc. Have you used your smart phone, tablet, or computer today? If so, it is because someone wrote code for you to do these things. And guess what? This technology and these skills are only becoming more and more in demand.

    Hmm....2020, that is when our current high school students will graduate college and when our current middle school students will graduate high school. Helping them learn the basics of coding and computer programming can set them up for success in an even larger digital world. But what if your school or your child doesn't have an opportunity to be in a technology group like Hyperstream? Well, there are great websites where they can learn to code for free. Below are a couple great resources, resources our Hyperstream club will be using this year. Have fun!

www.code.org    This site is AWESOME! Totally free, has some super-famous computer programmers supporting it, and is simple enough that my 9-year old son can work through it on his own, but difficult enough that I am challenged by it to. Basically, it is a step-by-step tutorial of what coding truly is at its most basic level and you get to complete challenges and earn trophies as you go. Here is a video explaining it better than I can.

Five IPad Apps that help learn coding skills. This blog post by Richard Byrne is a great description of some free resources that your children (and remember...even you!) can try to learn the basics of coding. I have not tested these yet, but plan to test them soon and have our students test them. Let me know what you think if you have tested them or when you test them. 

  Good luck!

Two-Week Back to School Boost!

 

  Well, like it or not, it is Back to School time. This shouldn't be a surprise since most stores put up their "Back to School" signage once the final 4th of July fireworks shows were over. But now that the calendar has hit August, we officially have just two weeks of "summer" left until school starts. How can students/families spend those two weeks? Working and studying every day all day? No. But working in an hour a day of some skill review and boosting? Yes!  But why study and review BEFORE school starts? Well, as an adult.....did you do a 2-4 week training before you were on your own for your job (I did student teaching and an internship!)? Before you have a child, did you read the books and take the parenting and birthing class? Before you went on vacation this summer, did you research where you were going and plan some activities? If you didn't do these things, your first day and first week could have been rough because you weren't "up to speed" or fully ready. And with young people, school work is only one of the anxieties thrown at them, as they have the whole social, emotional, physical part of their day at school every day. If you can help reduce their anxiety with the school work by starting a 2-week booster session now, that will help them feel at ease in that area and lower their stress and anxiety level overall. So....how do you do this? Here are some simple ways that I have used or heard other parents using.

Math:
   *Dump out your pockets, open the piggy banks....and count money! Vary the activities based on their ages, but for young kids...they love getting to keep the pocket change if they can count the money correctly. If they can't, I just say...study up and try again tomorrow!
   *Make basic math flashcards. I get in the habit of using tablet apps and phone apps, but having the kids make their own flashcards drives home the learning even more. Once made, have races and challenges with and against each other.
   *Board games where your children have to count the spaces they move, count money, use math skills.
   *Saxon Math. Search Saxon math lessons, worksheets, etc. on line and use or print what you need. With Saxon being such a large and widely used curriculum, there are no shortages of schools and teachers who have put the books online. This is also a great way to find the math lesson when your child forgets their book at school (trust me....we have had to do this several times!)

Science:
  *Go online and search "science experiments at home" and try some out. Most use basic home supplies and most websites tell you exactly what the kids should be learning.
  *Grow flowers and grow a garden. This can also help with math skills as well. Growing a garden can be a great learning experience and fun to eat the rewards when it is harvest time!
  *Go out and experience nature. When you are driving, talk about habitats you see. Talk about how businesses and homes being built change habitat and how animals adapt. Collect pond water and look at samples under a magnifying glass. Watch the weather and chart the weather (again, math skills!). Learning about the weather brings in all sorts of science knowledge and is a great thing to know a lot about as an adult.

Reading/Language:
    *Go to the library and get BOOKS!!!!
     *Then read the books. Read to your children and have them read to you. We often forget how important reading aloud is.
    *As they read, write down any word they stumble over and don't know. You can tell them what this word is and how to pronounce it or have them look up the word in a dictionary if they are older. Take these words and turn them into a weekly spelling list.
   *Daily and weekly spelling challenges. These don't sound very fun, but can be way more fun if each correct word means an M&M or an extra 5 minutes of TV that day or week. If you have a computer or tablet, put the words into SpellingCity.com and let your children play spelling games with the words.
   *Write down a few sentences to start a story and have your child write the next paragraph or more. The older the kid, the more they can write. I started a story like this. "I woke up one morning and everyone in my house was gone. When I looked outside, I knew exactly what happened because I saw...." And your child can amaze you with a creative story to fill in the rest.

Social Studies:
   *Plan a local trip together or even have them help you plan a vacation. Even if you don't take the vacation, they can help plan one. Helps with the money and math skills too if you really get them involved.
  *Puzzle of the United States. This is something I remember doing at my Grandparents house growing up. I still know where every state is because of doing that puzzle so often.
   *Study your state capitals and abbreviations. There are some great apps for this. We love Stack the States. Fun and kids learn a lot.
   *Talk about your errands you run and why you do them. Just helping your child learn what it takes to be an adult and a citizen in this world can really help them think about their place in this world and understand what it all means.
   *Don't shy away from the news, embrace it. I don't know that kids need to be watching the nightly news, but if there is a big story (Ebola, steroids in baseball, politics, war, etc.), help your child understand what it means and encourage them to research these stories more so that they can form their own thoughts and opinions. This world will soon be theirs, so educating them now and helping them learn to educate themselves can get them ready for not just the upcoming school year, but for life in general.

Performing Arts:
   *Music lessons! My kids are going to start piano lessons this year and I am excited to see how this affects their learning in other areas. Learning an instrument has been shown to help a young person's brain develop in other areas too.
   *Or download music apps and games. Children can play the Piano or other instruments on the IPad, they can mix music using free music mixing sites and software, or they can learn about music on their own.
   *Creative writing and artwork. You know what I have learned? Grandparents and other adults in your children's lives LOVE getting homemade artwork. So....spend 30 minutes or so just letting the kids use colored pencils, crayons, markers, paint or other crafts. No instructions needed....just creativity!
  *Exercise....daily! There is not enough room to outline all of the benefits to physical activity, especially at a young age. Just find ways to get your child running and playing each and every day....multiple times a day.

   There you go....a big list of things to do. The only problem is that by the time I finally typed all of this up (taking multiple breaks with my 5 kids and several visitors to see the new baby!), we are now LESS than 2 weeks from the first day of school. So...starting tomorrow, carve out a bit of time each day to try some of these things out. If you do it correctly, your kids may even have fun doing these and their first few days and weeks of school won't seem that stressful because their brain has already been prepped and primed for school. Good luck and have fun!