Stress, Anxiety, COVID-19 Virus, and Resources/Contacts

Well, about the time I am writing this would be about the time I would be at school with my own five kids and would be beginning to plan my day. Which students do I need to meet with, which students should I meet with, what teachers and parents can I reach out to, and in general...how can I help someone today? But instead, I am sitting in a chair at home wondering all these same things and not having an easy way to do any of them. My hope is maybe I can blog daily or every other day with some resources and ideas and still help in some way. And keep the hope and faith alive that soon I will be back to my office setting my daily goal to help as many as possible in as many ways as possible!

   Currently, my biggest worry and concern is about student (and adult!) anxiety and stresses. Anytime there is a change in schedule, you can expect change in behaviors, especially with kids. Doesn't matter if kids are 16 or 17 or 3 or 4, change in schedule equals change in behavior. And change in schedule equals anxiety and stress. Depending on the change, the anxiety and stress can be minimal or it can be fairly large. I think we all agree that this virus and the changes we have had to make would equal a very, very large change in our schedule. So anxiety and stress is a very normal reaction. So how can we, as parents, help our kids through this time? (and I am in this boat too as we have 5 kids and with a wife who is a medical professional, I am the only one home all day with them!) Here are some ideas, resources/links, and reminder of key phone numbers.

   First off, I want to make sure students and families know that our school contracts with Employee Family Resources (EFR) so students grades 6-12 have access to free therapy outside of school. Currently, these therapy sessions are done over the phone/video, but it is still an excellent resource. And even if you or your child doesn't need therapy, their 24/7 phone number is a great resource to take advantage of during times of stress, anxiety, confusion, anger, anything! Here is their website and phone number:

www.efr.org
515-244-6090

    A few other contact numbers that I think are important for every student and family to know are listed below. Please use these if you think someone could help.
*United Way COVID-19 hotline: 211  Just dial 211! You can also visit their website: 211.org

*National Crisis Hotline: 1-800-273-8255. This isn't just a suicidal thoughts and behaviors hotline, this is for anyone who feels they are in crisis or having a crisis. A trained person will answer the call 24/7 and help you through whatever you are going through.

*Texting hotlin: 741-741  Again, no matter what the crisis, text "HOME" to 741-741 and a trained person will begin to text back and forth with you. I have had students use this before and tell me it really helped them through their crisis. They were sent links and advice and support via text/their phone.

  Outside of phone numbers and outside resources, what else can parents and families do?

*Take care of yourself first and make sure you are working through your own stress/anxiety. The phrase "You can't pour from an empty cup" is very true. We can't help others unless we ourselves haven't been helped first. So all the ideas and resources below are just as important for adults as they are for kids.

*Sleep schedule. Keep it regular and get what you need! For kids, sleep is what regulates their emotions and works through their background to-do list each night. Lack of sleep or irregular sleep does not allow kids to work through all the background stuff and their emotions aren't as regulated, so the waking-time during the day can be up and down and much higher stress/anxiety. As much as it is fun to Binge Netflix or play video games, get these out of the bedrooms and stick to a regular sleep schedule (8 to 8? 9 to 9? 9 to 7?)

*Have a schedule during the day. This does not mean "home school" work all day long. We all have to understand that this situation is unprecedented and very strange for all. Stressed brains cannot learn and do not learn. So no point in cramming instruction and education all day long. Allow time for exercise, down time, stress-reducing activities, etc. This will make time you set up for education or schooling much better. But whatever the schedule is, write it down and try to stick to it as much as possible. Kids crave structure (even if they say they don't....they do!)

*Exercise! Go for walks (stay distanced from others, but still...go for a walk!). Do exercise inside. Our body's mental health depends on our physical health so we cannot forget our physical health during this time. Plus exercise produces positive hormones that help our mood and reduce stress, anxiety, and depressive symptoms.

*Breathing/meditation/calming apps. There are tons of these on the App store and online. And sometimes just playing some relaxing music from Youtube or Spotify in the background while we rest or read is all our brain and emotions need. Personally, I love the CALM app and use it daily and do the daily Calm meditation. Just 10 minutes a day but helps my entire day go better (and helps me sleep better!).

*Family time! Life does not slow down very often in life, but now it has. Let's use it. Make sure to eat as a family, talk as a family, play a game as a family. Teenagers may push back against this idea, but this is not the time to let your teen isolate. Humans are social animals and we are not meant to isolate. Sure, some of us are introverted and may not like socializing as much as others, but we are still not meant to isolate. And we shouldn't isolate from our families. So make sure to have a meal or a game together or do something as a family every day. This chance we have been given to slow down and work on our family bonds may have an effect that truly lasts a lifetime.

One final resource from our Student Assistance Program (EFR), is at this link. Just some overall ideas on how to deal with stress and anxiety. Some are things I listed above and others are different ideas. A good one-page document to keep handy.


Until I see all of you and our students next, please stay safe and healthy and don't hesitate to reach out if you need something!