What
Parents Need to Know about “Sexting”
First
off, what is “Sexting”? Sexting is “the sending or receiving of sexually
explicit or sexually suggestive images, messages, or video via a cell phone or
the Internet”. And many times, this can
be a nude “selfie” sent to another young person. So why do middle school
parents need to know about this topic? Because a recent study shows 1 in 3
teens have participated in sexting and 1 in 4 think it is a normal part of teen
life. And when adults talk to teens about this issue, many times the students
respond with “What’s the big deal? It is just a picture.” Well, it is a big
deal. It isn’t a normal part of teen life.
And it isn’t just a picture. It can lead to low self-esteem, to bullying
incidents, to harassment and exploitation, and can lead to criminal charges.
The
teen brain is more likely to take risks and engage in risky behavior AND has
not yet developed the key areas that can help with decision-making and long
term planning. So as adults in their lives, we must help them understand the
short and long-term consequences of sending a sexually explicit photo or video.
Nothing sent via text or Internet is ever really fully deleted. Those photos
and videos always exist. And the countless stories of hackers gaining access to
photos on phones and the Internet and distributing these around the world are
just as common as teens sending the photos around to their friends. Neither are
good, but both can and do happen. And that is usually the first time a teen
realizes they made a mistake that they can’t take back. And these events can
lead to ridicule, embarrassment, low self-esteem, depression, and possible
self-harm or suicide. And depending on the state’s laws, sending AND/OR
receiving these photos can lead to a lot of legal trouble. So these aren’t just
“pictures”, these are life-changing situations for young people.
What
can you do? Talk with your child. Now. Explain that you understand the troubles
a teen goes through with body image, self-esteem, peer pressure, and
relationship pressures. Just because we didn’t grow up with all this technology
doesn’t mean we didn’t have all these issues. Then explain the many dangers of
sexting and help them understand the long-term consequences that can occur from
just sending one photo or video (I didn’t even mention future college and
career choices…these groups Google potential applicants these days!). And keep
the lines of communication open. When a young person feels the external (or
internal) pressure to send an explicit photo to someone else, they need to
trust that they can talk to a parent about this pressure and have you help
them. It may be a tough conversation,
but it is a conversation that could save their life.
For
more resources, please visit our district counseling blog as well as the sites
listed below.
District Counseling blog: www.carlislecounseling.blogspot.com
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